I was raised in a conservative home and was always a pretty good kid. At college I decided to rebel and party hard. I met a man online during my second year and he enticed me with promises of a life of ease. I drank too much and threw many of my morals out the window. During our time together he told me that no good Christian man would want me because of what I had done. I believed him. He assaulted me multiple times, but I stayed quiet out of fear. I was too prideful to admit my own mistakes.
Within two weeks I knew something was wrong. My body felt off kilter. I took a pregnancy test at four weeks and it came out positive. I was so incredibly scared…my parents were conservative Christians and I didn’t know how they would react. I could not afford a child on my own, I did not even want a child. I was a 20 year old college-drop-out.
I considered abortion and called a pregnancy help line, they were unfortunately not much help. I felt so alone…as much as I wanted this child gone, I could not foresee myself killing what I knew was a human life inside me.
The next day I drove to get prenatal vitamins and considered my options. Through friends I was introduced to all of the government programs that are set up to help women like me, and that helped pay the bills for a short while.
Into my forth month, I broke down. For the first time in years I was crying because I wanted my mother. I drove home to tell my family the news. They were shocked but everyone wanted me to come home. At the time I was too enveloped in my own pride to come home and humble myself to my mistakes.
Finally, in my third trimester, I came home. I knew in my heart that a child needed a home and a family. A single mother could not provide that, and I had the option of adoption. To my surprise, my parents were waiting with open arms to accept my child. We are her family now, and I could not be happier. I am back in college, getting great grades, and enjoying life.
My daughter is now the life of every party. I cannot imagine coming home from class at night and not seeing her smiling and asking “up.” And, while I wish my parents could be grandparents rather than parents, I am so fortunate to have them here. Not only that, but they are always thrilled to walk through the door and see her running to say hello. She has changed our lives for the better. She is my sunshine and motivation, and she has allowed my parents and I to have a better relationship than ever before. Our unexpected baby turned into a miracle, and I am so grateful every day that I did not choose to abort, because the world gained one more beautiful smile the day she was born.
I know that every pregnant woman does not have the options I did, but there are so many places to get help. Government programs, charities… and even families who would love to adopt. Several of my siblings are adopted.
Keep your chin up. Two years ago I could not have seen myself here. Only for the grace of God was I able to reach out of the dark place I was in.